Latex catsuits are fucking hot. Not only do they look amazing because they are skin-tight and glossy but you have an excuse to get lubed-up and have your slaves rub oil all over your body to help shine you up and the sensation of someone touching you when you are in latex can be very arousing. However, there are many things one doesn’t consider before shimmying into her first latex catsuit, so I am going to answer the most common question I get when I am wearing mine. “How do you go to the bathroom in that?”

Well first of all, let’s point out that to get IN to a latex catsuit you need to prepare your body. Some people use baby powder to get into their latex, but I prefer lube as I’d rather not smell like a newborn when I am engaging in fetish activities. That’s just my preference and you are entitled to use whatever works best for you. I basically grease my body up so I look like a bodybuilder and then rub a little lube on the inside of the catsuit so I can slither into it like a snake. Don’t pull on the latex because it is fragile and could tear, so make sure you don’t use your claws or have any sharp rings or other jewellery on.  Slide the latex up onto your body until it’s in the right place, but don’t force it. You may need assistance with putting your latex on, as sometimes your hands can be very slippery from all the lube and doing up zippers behind you can be troublesome, so always try and have a slave with you to help you dress. They will feel rewarded for having the honour of helping you and you will feel good knowing your latex and body are fully lubed up and ready to go!

Now that you finally have your catsuit on, how are you going to go to the bathroom? If you wear your catsuit to a fetish event, you may be stuck in it for several hours and taking it off and on constantly eats up all your play time, and no one wants to miss out on play time! Taking the whole catsuit off to use the bathroom would be very time-consuming and every woman in line to use the ladies’ room would give you the stink eye for all of eternity, plus you don’t want to be trying to hold those weird poses while you try to do up the zipper on your back in a dirty stall that barely fits a urinal. Thankfully most catsuits are made with a two-way zipper at the crotch, so you can access any area you need *wink wink*.

Let me explain by telling you about my first attempt to use the bathroom in my latex catsuit.  I unzipped the crotch and had performance anxiety. My brain was telling me not to pee because I had clothing on, but my body was screaming “get this out of me!” I had to coerce my body into just letting go, which it eventually did, but as I finished my business and stood up and tried to zip myself back into place I realized I had unzipped too far. As a curvaceous woman with slippery hands covered in lube, I was having some trouble tucking my butt back into the suit to zip the lip – so to say. I kept trying, praying to God I wouldn’t accidently rip (or zip) anything by carefully giving it a tug to close the gap. Imagine yourself in a tiny dim-lit bathroom stall thrusting your pelvis forward while trying to tuck your butt cheeks into a pair of pants that feel like a slippery fish while trying to do up a zipper. It’s a hot look, I know.  I managed to stay calm and didn’t think about the bathroom lineup at the busy club (cuz let’s face it, the ladies room always has a lineup).  I wondered if my best solution to zip this thing up was to just open the door and ask a stranger to hold my butt cheeks in while I tried to zip up my vagina. Do you think that is too much to ask a stranger? Where is my slave when I need him? Luckily for me my patience was strong and I was able to finally and carefully zip myself in.

My second attempt at braving the bathroom in a latex catsuit was just as bad. In fear of unzipping too far and being held hostage by my poor outfit choice in the bathroom, I didn’t quite unzip far enough. As I sat there telling my brain again that it was alright to relax, I realized there was warm fluid trickling down the INSIDE of my catsuit. Sometimes I really think guys have it easy in the bathroom department. When I felt the fluid warming and puddling in my boots I cringed, there is nothing sexy about sweating in a second layer of skin in your own urine, or at least, that’s not my preferred fetish. No offence to anyone who’s fetish it is. Fool me once, shame on you catsuit, fool me twice shame on me. Lesson learned, bring my slave to the bathroom.

You will be happy to know, I have since mastered the art of peeing in a latex catsuit, I don’t need any more brain coaching, slaves or stranger help, and I am careful with my zipping and unzipping. I have discovered the perfect way to maneuver my body into a position that will allow me to zip myself up quickly and carefully. But I thought writing this out and enlightening the people who were curious, would provide a laugh at my expense, which I have no problem providing. Cheers and happy latex-lubing!


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